simulation 004; visual

[i_run_you_chase]

[Jarod appears]

So this is what they call a "Flood", is that correct?

OOC: Jarod is affected by the Truth flood.

Comments

[yourunichase]

Wait for it.

[She frowned at him for a moment, and paced again.]

Then someone asked me if you loved me. Do you?

[She looked vaguely shocked as the words fell out of her mouth; she really didn't want to ask that.]

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

[cue panic]

Do I ask people if they love other people?

[yourunichase]

[She read the panic, and that was enough. She didn't push it.]

Forget it. Just forget it.

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

What do you want me to say, Miss Parker?

[this is meant to be rhetorical, but he unwittingly makes it into a question]

[yourunichase]

[Parker's hands were on her mouth for a moment.]

I just want what you want, Jarod. I want the truth.

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

Now's the time to get it.

[he takes a few steps towards her]

Why did you leave the other night?

[yourunichase]

Please, you're so evasive you won't even answer stupid questions.

[She swallows but she doesn't move away.]

Because you were going to kiss me. Why were you going to?

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

You haven't asked me anything that either of us consider stupid.

[and while he'd like to avoid this, he can't:] Because I wanted to.

[yourunichase]

Why?

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

Don't---

[but it's too late, and he struggles with:]

I just did. Emotions are not entirely scientific and that's why the Centre has people like me, rather than computers, calculating them.

[yourunichase]

Why do you always have to bring everything back to that? Is that why you wanted to kiss me? Was it just a big fuck you to my father and them?

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

It had nothing to do with them, Miss Parker.

Why do you always pull away?

[yourunichase]

Because I'm scared! [Parker frowned quickly. because that was not what she meant to say.]

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

[and he takes another step towards her and lowers his voice]

Of what?

[yourunichase]

[Parker took a step back.] Of what this means. Of what you mean.

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

[he doesn't advance again] What do I mean, Miss Parker?

[yourunichase]

I don't know! I don't know what you mean. I hate that I can't just lock everything away anymore, because you're here and Fuck!

[The word was growled, and she turned away, her hand on her forehead, squeezing it.]

I don't know why when people ask if I love you I feel compelled to say 'yes.'

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

[he stands there, stunned, for just a moment, then takes a few steps towards her, until he's right behind her]

[softly:] Maybe it's because you do.

[yourunichase]

[She knows he's behind her, but she doesn't turn around.]

I also feel compelled to say no. I think it's just cause I'm fucked up.

Are you in love with me, Jarod?

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

At least you're acknowledging that.

[he reaches out and puts a hand to her shoulder]

I think I'm in the same place as you.

[yourunichase]

Yeah? You think I'm fucked up too?

[Parker did turn a bit, and she faced him, but she didn't pull away.]

Why are you here, Jarod? Why are you always here? I don't understand it. At the worst times in my life, you're just always there.

[Her voice dropped.]

Why did you leave the cemetery?

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

I think the Centre does terrible things to all of us.

[quiet] Maybe that's how it's supposed to be.

[and he wants to say something really vague or untrue like 'I thought you wanted to be left alone', but he can't lie, so he says:] I hate---[he grits his teeth, but it comes out anyway] I hate seeing you in pain.

Are you going to ask me all of the difficult questions now?

[yourunichase]

Me too. [The words were said quietly, but honestly.]

Do you really think that's how it's supposed to be? We're supposed to be?

[Parker blinked at that, watching him quickly and she took a deep breath.]

Like you wouldn't ask me them.

[i-run-you-chase.livejournal.com]

I don't know. [this is said sadly, but honestly. He wishes he knew, but some things just don't make sense to Genius Boy, including his own emotions]

I'm not asking you now. I want you to want to tell me.

[yourunichase]

I don't know what you want me to tell me. I've never known, Jarod.

[She wants to ask him what he wants to know, but...she can't.]

I really don't know how to do this. I'm bad at this. Tommy... Paddy... you. I'm bad at it!